New Ministeroni

Ahoy There,


I be Phil Thomson, the second Ministeroni in arr Church. I be anchored in Auckland and available to officiate Pastafarian weddings anywhere the Kiwi flag flies! Most particularly I be the Ministeroni for the City of Sails. Nothin’ could be finer fer a young seadog!


When I not be sending signals to Church members, or doin’ other good works, I be shooting mini-golfs (not sentient) to keep me sword arm fit. Avast the treasure cover course is the one I be preferring. I’m a big fan of the moving pictures though not the Pirates of the Caribbean – a Disney assault on the senses! I be a massive Simpsons fan and my pirate voice is modeled on the Sea Capitan.


I wanted to be a Ministeroni after reading that The Church of The Flying Spaghetti monster was officially recognised in New Zealand. At first, I simply thought that a Pastafarian wedding just looked like it was a rollicking good time! I mean c’mon – pirate costumes, a pasta feast with beer and wine – what’s not to like about that?!


I did some further scanning of the horizon and discovered that New Zealand’s Church doctrine (Arr Treasure!) is one many intelligent Kiwi’s (meself especially) identify with as their ‘default position’. Treating all sentient beings with consideration – that sounds pretty straight forward. Live a healthy and happy life – I’m onboard with that! Being respectful of others, not discriminating – no arguments there. No sin or threats of punishment now or in the future; no requirements for how I look, what I wear, what I eat or drink – that’s easy!, No tithing, and being encouraged to enjoy meself – yarr that all works for me! You?


I particularly like how the New Zealand Church has incorporated ideas of modern philosophers, such like Sam Harris and Peter Singer. Tis important to be thinking critically of arr society’s norms so we can see where they prevent progress towards a more ethical and inclusive society. I be particularly passionate about using science-based evidence to make decisions, especially given that we live in a single world where poor decisions be affecting people for generations to come.


So here is something – Arr Church and its Treasures which offers good fun to an intelligent community which reflects arr Kiwi culture – at least the thinking ones!


Welcome aboard this fine ship, welcome to this fine crewe and let’s set sail!




Ministeroni Phil

Like Punxsutawney Phil only better looking, smarter, and a more able prognosticator

3 thoughts on “New Ministeroni

  1. Just got back to Canada after spending the month of November scouring NZ from Bay of Islands all the wiggly way to Stewart Island in search of the FSM. Is he disguised as a sheep? Or maybe a squashed possum? Y’all need to get some graven images of the FSM plastered around, maybe draped over some crosses. You blew the chance for a nice new flag a few years back, so maybe lets get the FSM out there on some flag poles. Might look nice on the tail fins of the Air New Zealand fleet. Pastafarians rule!

  2. Ahoy,
    I’m really interested in learning more about the mighty FSM and it’s origins as the idol of this religion. Can y’all help?

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